The Grist Mill Criminal Of The Year 2010: Julian Assange

Julian Assange (Digitally Altered Image)

The Grist Mill Criminal of the Year award goes to Mr. Julian Assange, the editor in chief of WikiLeaks, for criminalizing the whole world.

We had been living out peaceful lives, baking bread for our families, doing bhajan-keertan or saying prayers, and teaching ABCs to the kids in our grand living room, when suddenly this specter of transparency begins to sweep out dirt from beneath the furniture and starts dropping cobwebs from the ceiling. I can’t even breathe now since I am allergic to dust.

You might have already read about his sex crimes in detail. Here are the outlines of some of his more heinous crimes since the foundation of WikiLeaks in 2006:

1. He published material about extra-judicial killings in Kenya for which the other anarchist organization, the so-called Amnesty International, gave him Media Award in 2009. By publishing this report, he tarnished the image of Kenyan politicians and police.

2. He ousted the closely guarded secret about toxic waste dumping on African coasts by a shipping company called Trafigura Beheer BV, which caused 17 deaths and over 30,000 injuries. The company’s executives tried to suppress the morbid news to avoid burdening the whole world with grief, but WikiLeaks thwarted their efforts.

3. Horror of horrors! He published Church of Scientology manual. This was a criminal act of the highest order. What if someone plagiarized the manual and started another cult organization named Church of Physictology?

4. He also published the operating procedure manual of Guantanamo Bay, a controversial detainment facility established in 2002 by the Bush Administration to hold detainees from the war in Afghanistan and Iraq.

5. WikiLeaks posted financial documents disclosing tax evasions by Bank Julius Baer's clients.

6. He also wants to show us how people are killed in wars by releasing hundreds of thousands of documents about Iraq and Afghan war. He claims that our holy war against terror in which hundreds of thousands of people are killed and even more are maimed for life, is illegal. We don’t want to hear such disturbing news. He has made our lives hell by disclosing the nexus between the Governments and corporations by releasing the diplomatic cables.

Now he plans to release information about unethical practices of some major banks. We will not have peace on this earth until this criminal is gagged. Oh Bhagwan Sathya Sai Baba, please do something about him so that we continue teaching ABCs to our kids in peace, and when they become proficient in reading, teach them not to read things like WikiLeaks.

Watch the master criminal being applauded by the members of his cult in this video:

This article was originally written for 21fools, an online magazine.