Lessons From Sania Mirza Fiasco: Tips To Raise A Daughter

Sunday, April 11, 2010

(Update: This article is selected for Tejaswee Rao Blogging Awards)

Sania Miza

Hello there, people of Pakistan, do not grieve. Think this way—you are not losing a son, rather gaining a daughter. We understand the mental agony and helplessness people undergo when a son gets married. Especially, when he is unreasonably enamored of his new wife and her family, leaving the parents, siblings, and cousins in the lurch. But do not be disheartened, his crush will eventually fade, and then he will once again be the same old Shoaiby Baby of yesteryears. After all blood is thicker than water of the River Musi.

Actually, I was trying to hide my disappointment by saying all that, but, damn, it’s spilling from all directions, making it impossible for me to maintain the façade. How could you Sania? How could you betray the country that showered love, adulation, Arjuna Award, and above all Padma Shri on you? How could you fall in love with a Paki?
The President of Shri Ram Sena, Rajeev Mahajan, has urged the Central government to prevent Sania from representing India in any future event. “Sania Mirza didn’t find a suitable match for herself among one billion Indians; she doesn’t even find a single man among 150 million Muslims.” I wish Mahajan had presented a logical figure, excluding married men, women, children, and also old and sick people.

Ever since I learned about her indiscretion, I’ve been condemning her at every forum. “Sania, you have disgraced us all. Naak katwa di. Kahin moonh dikhane layak nahin rakha!”

Uncle Thackeray is also mad, and rightfully so, although I think he should have acted earlier and found a suitable boy for Sania instead of castigating her for tight clothes, fashion, and love affairs.

Actually, the patriarch of her family is entirely to be blamed, and should be punished so that no right-thinking father would ever let his daughter go berserk. First, a girl should not be allowed to be born at all. And if, despite all efforts to prevent her from getting born, she had been born and had survived the infancy, she should be raised like a docile cow—subdued and obedient. And then when she reaches puberty and before her thoughts become impure she should be married off to a boy from similar caste with sufficient dowry.

Indian girls are not supposed to enjoy their lives, rather born to do puja-pathh, namaz, and serve the in-laws, husband, and children—in that order. They should be instilled with this unwritten social rule at an early age. It was blasphemous to allow Sania to play sports in the first place, and then to let her travel to distant countries, including Wimbledon. According to Mark Twain, “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness…”

All that exposure did have a corrupting influence, turning her into such a strong-willed and independent person that she started making her own life decisions. If she remains the role model for the little girls in India, then nothing can save the rich and glorious culture and tradition of patriarchy in our society, in which women are…umm…worshipped.

Now, we are left with no option, but to wish Sania Mirza good luck. I want to warn her about the country she is going to set her foot on with these words from Saeed Naqwi’s brother, “Pakistan is a nice place except that it is too full of Muslims. For an Indian Muslim it is a little tiring to be surrounded by Mohammad, Ahmad, Tahir, Salim, Salman.” Beware!

And in future, if Sania Mirza has daughters, I wish she would raise them according to the Indian traditions and values so that when they grow up, they would not end up marrying some African or Indonesian, like the US President Obama’s white mother had done.

Update: Related Link: It's My Life with Sania Mirza  
(Picture courtesy outlookindia.com)


  1. Bravo - well said and written !

  2. Very intelligent and humorous. Why don't you give it to the newspapers?

  3. lol...As usual very witty...I heard this joke the other day, it goes like this...Poor (read stupid) Sania...She took the Indian pledge too seriously "All Indians are my brother and sisters" :))

  4. Thanks!! @Anonymous koun ho tum?
    @Buzz: I'm happy you liked it!
    @Arnie: Lol at the pledge! They should add 'except one' to it :D

  5. Brilliantly written! Bravo!

  6. phunnee..as always..!

    Mark Twain rules :)

  7. Great post!

    As an average Indian, I don't give a hoot to whom she marries. It is her personal life and I care less even if she marries an Elbonian. However, I hate the stupid media for portraying it as if India-Pakistan relations are going to improve because of Sania marrying Shoaib and Pakistanis are open to accept her as their daughter-in-law even after he clearly specifying that she is going to be in Dubai.

    And Mark Twain has something humorous and profound to say about everything. What a man! :)

  8. Bold and beautiful! I wish I am publisher :-)

  9. I think marrying Pakistani is not new. Reena Roy did that several years ago. I am sure Sania you will be able to survive this Indo-Pak controversy but not sure you will succeed to live with this man who is not more than just pack of lies, banned for a year on match fixing charges and disown-own and then disown (talaq) his first wife on the same day. Giri rightly said good luck Sania...

  10. Bravo. Very nicely done. Should be published on a larger scale!!

  11. "I wish Mahajan had presented a logical figure, excluding married men, women, children, and also old and sick people"

    ha ha ha ... tussi baade majakiya ho ji !

    enjoyed..smiled and laughed.. really 'bauhut hi badhiya likhti ho aap'

    and thanks for this quote
    “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness…”

  12. Thanks S(long_int), Jagat, Ushinor, Jatkesha, Abhishek, JC, Nabeel, Arkjesh...thank you all very much. I am overwhelmed and greatly honored by your response :-)

  13. And shame on you for writing such a poignant piece instead of just doing your thing in the kitchen. (Unless you wrote it in the kitchen :P)

    What punch! A big applause, seriously :)


  14. @ Anjuli, @Maya: Thanks!
    @Gauri: That's so 42ish of you!

  15. One of your best works..I'm sure you have much more in store, but I liked it for its hard-hitting humor,and especially for the audacity of Sania to be born...excellent play of words :)

  16. Came here through DesiPundit.

    Hilarious piece!

  17. @Sangeeta: Thanks a lot! You keep the bar high for me :-)
    @Reena(Soli): Thanks! It's great to hear from you!!
    @Everyone coming from DesiPundit: Keep visiting :-)

  18. Oh man! :) really hard-hitting ;) Great stuff :D

  19. The Sania Mirza marriage affair has nothing to do with female suppression in Indian society. Even you will agree that the same issue would not have risen if it was a groom from UAE, Indonesia or even Africa. Pakistan is a touchy subject(with good reason) and even if a male sportsperson were carrying out this step there would be a backlash of a similar manner.

  20. And what was uncle T doing looking at a young girl's tight clothes. He should have been rolling those beads of Rudraksh which we see with him.

  21. Lol @ Anonymous!!

    @ Raw Truth, Rach and Madhav: Thanks for your visit and nice words!

    @Rahul: Thanks for your visit! At least you agree there is female suppression in Indian society. If you don't want to link the two it's your choice. But give this point a thought--why have Pakistanis been celebrating, while Indians hurling abuses? And also when in a Bolly movie Indian boy seduces a Pakistani girl some Pakistanis do object!

    I like Sania and I wish her happiness!!

  22. Of course there's female suppression in Indian society. Just as there is suppression of male children by parents, suppression of the poor classes by the rich etc. But the story of an affluent and famous female sports person (who had the freedom to choose her partner and then break off her engagement when she found a better partner) living in one of the biggest cities of India does not hold a mirror to any of those issues.

    Sania's marriage issue is so huge in India only because the groom in question belongs to a country that has been sending ppl to massacre citizens and burn property in India. Currently India is struggling to get Pakistan's help to curb terrorism. The frustration against Pakistan's non-cooperation is showing up everywhere including in the Sania-Shoaib issue.

    I'm not saying that marriages should be affected by political relations between nations, just trying to bring to light the source of angry views. People from Pakistan don't have these reasons to denounce the marriage, so they are celebrating.

  23. I cant believe that Sania's parents actually approved of this guy even if they had fervently wished for their daughter to marry a high profile sports person. But did they have a choice? Anyway, Sania probably earns a lot more money than her parents ever did and so the patriarch has limited control. What can they do but to put up a brave front à la Jaya chakravarthy when the dream girl married a married man and converted to islam?

  24. And of course her parents should have taught her that once married, every Indian girl (Paraya Dhan) belongs to their husband's village, city, state, community, religion and country, that is why every patriotic, rudraksh holding Indian is so offended by her 'betrayal' - marriage has automatically made Sania a Pakistani.

    Brilliant post :)

  25. @Rahul: You are very good at expressing thoughts. I like your writing style and energy. Regarding Pakistan, I leave Pak bashing to politicians and religious fundamentalist.

    @Revathy: Thanks for your visit...I'm collecting dohas for you!

    Hello @IMH !!...looks like I found a buddy in you! Thanks for the encouraging words!

  26. wonderfully well drafted!

    I wonder if Sania was in a hallucination that she was playing the promoter of 'Aman ki aas'..a UNICEF ambassador role in the hindsight or better still, Nobel peace prize. (If Obama can, Sania can too)

    PS For once in my life, I agree with Thakrey:)

  27. Brilliant Post,very well said...

  28. Came here through Desipundit. Wonderful writing.

    ladka ladki raazi to kya karega kaazi? Everyone should just shut their mouths and give their blessings or wishes to the newly wedded couple.

    Both of them made a decision to stay in Dubai. So, they probably know what kind of society they will get into if they go to Pak.

    You forgot to add that the girl should treat her husband as GOD and fulfill his every wish.

    I once attended a kalyana utsavam at a temple and the priest was saying that the groom should be treated as "Maha Vishnu" by the bride and her family. I walked out of the function to the consternation of my folks. lol.

  29. Thanks @Rajesh, @Abhishek and @Shweta!!

    @Anand: Thanks for the kind words! And yes a woman should treat the husband as God and his parents and relatives as Maha Gods, whatever that means....

  30. Why lace it with sweeteners, GB? May all the daughters of Sania Mirza marry Africans, as in Uncle Tom!

  31. sometimes you just blow readers mind, very well written.

  32. @Umashankar: Yeah, may all the daughters marry whoever they wish!

    @Brijesh: Thanks a lot :-)

  33. Congratulations :) This post in one of the winners of 'Tejaswee Rao Blogging Awards - 2011' (TRBA 2011). We would like to create an ebook with all the winning entries in 47 categories on Feminism and Gender Issues in India (and one category on Animals Rights). Please do let us know if you are fine with your winning post/s being included in this ebook. ( Please click here to let us know).