Maria Sharapova And Sachin Fans

What has this world come to? Why are people acting like thin-skinned tomatoes, squirting out juice at the slightest prick? Our country has become a nation of outrages. People just can't tolerate other people's point of view. To all the outraged people out there, I have a simple message--imagine yourself in others' situation before criticizing them. I am deeply pained and anguished by the horrible stuff written by the paid media denouncing Sachin Tendulkar's fans. Yes, the columnists do get paid.

To those who are unaware of this national crisis of pride and honor, here is a brief summary. Maria Sharapova--whoever she is--was playing tennis at Wimbledon--wherever it is. Our cricketing legend, Bharat Ratna, master blaster, Sachin Tendulkar, whom we revere as God, needed some entertainment. So like the raja-maharajas of yore, who used to watch nautch girls shake their booties for amusement, or like Salman Dabangg Khan, who watches Munni's badnam dance and halkat jawani when he is tired of thrashing goons, Sachin, tired of being worshipped, went to Wimbledon, probably near Jhoomritalaiya, to see Maria Sharapova play tennis, some sort of jumping game played in short skirts.

Now imagine if the nautch girl had said, "I don't know this fatso," indicating Maharaja So and So, what punishment she would have got? Yes, she would have been buried alive between two brick walls. Imagine Munni saying, "Who let this orangutan loose?" on seeing Dabangg Khan. Bhai would have certainly run his Toyota Land Cruiser over her.

This is what Maria Sharapova did. She uttered the blasphemous words, "I don't," when asked, "Do you know who Sachin is?" Since then we, the Sachin fans, have been trying to educate Maria Sharapova. Yeah, we have been continually posting insightful comments on each and every picture on Maria Sharapova's Facebook page. We have posted more than 100,000 comments, showing Munni her true place, reclaiming the lost glory of Bharatmata, proving that ours is the best country, and Sachin, the greatest player in the world.

This was all going well until I came across the pseudo-intellectuals out there, writing disparagingly about Sachin fans. Calling us names like Sachintards. Many of my fan-fellows can't even defend themselves coherently. The Grist Mill has always stood for the weak and the defenseless. Most of my brothers are weak in language skills. Some can only copy-paste comments, some can only repeat, Sachin Sachin Sachin..., and some can only write abuses. But one thing is for sure, all of them have hearts of gold--pure 24-carat gold. They may seem hard from outside, but inside they are all squishy squashy, like small eggs that can't hatch, can't grow into chickens.

I sincerely wish that Sachin Tendulkar also comes out in open to boost his fans' morale and congratulate them for their hard work on Maria Sharapova's Facebook page.