Making Sabyasachi’s Childhood Dreams Come True

Recently, I happened to watch "Farah's childhood dreams come true" on NDTV. It is one of the episodes of a show called, Band Baajaa Bride with Sabyasachi. This episode was about a 25-year-old girl who is a vegetable vendor’s daughter. Sabyasachi, the fashion designer, who has made a fortune by draping healthy Bollywood actresses in curtains and bed-sheets and selling beautifully designed clothes at exorbitant price, helps the girl fulfill her childhood dream. I learned that he has been doing such philanthropy since last year.

I was greatly moved by Sabyasachi Mukherjee's gesture. I myself, coming from a poor family, understand that an underprivileged girl’s only dream in life is to get bedecked in inordinately expensive bridal outfit and jewelry on her wedding day. Mark my words, girls like us never dream of becoming financially independent or wish to learn any life skills other than cooking and cleaning. We only dream of having fairy-tale weddings, where we would look like princesses. We don’t want to work hard or earn a living, just want someone/anyone to magically fulfill our wishes.

Although, most of the times, the parents go bankrupt fulfilling their daughters’ dreams, some of those who show lapse of judgment by marrying their daughters miserly, risk the girls being burned by the in-laws. Many smart parents have been killing their daughters in wombs to save themselves from the expenses of Sabyasachi weddings.

This is why I was greatly overwhelmed to see Sabyasachi and his team help this wretched girl and her family by not only providing them with high-end designer clothes, makeup, and accessories for various wedding ceremonies, but also giving the girl a beauty makeover. They made her hair bouncy, scrubbed and bleached her face to lighten her skin color, and got the gap between her front teeth fixed.

                           Before...                                                               After...

Farah Menon

Oh my, this was so touching, so heart warming. Sabyasachi also reinforces our notion that a marriage is much more than a union of two people in love. Rather, it is more about costumes, makeup, jewelry, etc. etc. My heart was overcome with extreme gratitude for Sabyasachi Mukherjee. So much gratitude that I decided to help him in every possible way I could.

I sent a message to Sabyasachi Mukherjee, complimenting him on his benevolence and magnanimity and told him that I wanted to fulfill his childhood dreams. He got very excited at the offer. It seemed like he was well aware of the reputation of the Grist Mill. Now, I want to tell you that despite my humble beginnings, I have reached a point in my life where I have the ability and resources to help poor miserable rich people. So when I asked him about his childhood dreams, he said that his only desire had been to make Angelina Jolie fall in love with him, and he had been forlorn and heartbroken ever since Brad Pitt had ensnared her. For past many years, Sabyasachi has been unsuccessfully trying to look like Brad Pitt.

Our team at the Grist Mill was humbled by the poor rich kid’s desire to have good time with Angelina Jolie. It was also heart wrenching to learn that while the girls and women all over the globe hankered for Sabyasachi look, he craved for a Brad Pitt look.

So we have now created a three-step strategy to help Sabyasachi Mukherjee. The first step is to give him a dream makeover. Although, he used to look quite a dapper a few years ago, after the Brangelina fiasco he has immersed himself so much in work that he has stopped taking care of himself. These days, he looks extremely shabby and out of shape. To impress Angelina Jolie, our team needs to work methodically on his appearance. The experts in out team have suggested a clean look for him. The beard and hair will be trimmed. His entire body is extremely hairy, so we will get his hair thinned by laser hair removal. He also needs help from a plastic surgeon to smooth away the pock marks on his face.

We will make him discard his medieval kurta-pajama, and dress him in trendy clothes and shoes sold at the Grist Mill boutique. We have a big business of buying used clothes and making them trendy by tears and color splashes, and then selling them as designer wear.

After overhauling his wardrobe, we will begin an intensive diet and exercise regimen. It will take around six months to get him in shape—he has accumulated a lot of flab around his waist—but at the end we will make him look like Brad Pitt. Have a look at Sabyasachi’s before and after pictures:

                         Before...                                                            After... (Predicted)

Sabyasachi Mukherjee

The next step will be to make him mentally sound. We will make him read classics by feminist authors, and coach him about the issues plaguing the first, the second, and the third-world countries. He comes across as a quick learner and we hope he will memorize all the issues by heart. Our aim is to make him sound like George Clooney and Matt Damon.

The third and final step will be to put him in the vicinity of Angelina Jolie by design. For that, we will have to snoop about Jolie’s calendar and accordingly arrange invitations and chance encounters for Sabyasachi. After that, he will have to take the matters in his own hands.

Subsequently, after several such rendezvous, we expect that he will surely get well-acquainted with Angelina Jolie. She will start trusting him. We at the Grist Mill will be overjoyed at our ability to help rich people fulfill their childhood dreams. Our team predicts that finally Angelina Jolie will invite him to her mansion, hand-in-hand, lead him to her bedroom and give him a job... of looking after the wardrobes of her eight children. (I have added two of her future kids as well.)