In The Court Of His Highness Salman Khurshid

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

(Picture courtesy PTI)
Indian Cabinet Minister and Congress leader Salman Khurshid says, "I was made the Law Minister and asked to work with a pen…sure I will work with a pen, but with blood as well." Watch the following video:



What we the mango people can infer from this statement is that either the animated, courageous, mettlesome Law Minister wants to become a butcher or a surgeon, or wants to remain at his post, but dispense justice in a bloody way. If it is the latter case, we can imagine a few scenarios:

Case 1:
Supplicant #1: Your Lordship, this is my neighbor, Murgichor. He has stolen my hen.
Salman Khurshid: Bring the stolen hen here. I will cut it myself as I want to work with blood. And then the thief will clean it as a punishment.

Case 2:
Supplicant #2: My Lord, my wife has brain tumor. The hospital is charging too much for the treatment.
Salman Khurshid: Hey slogan-shouting Chamcha, yes, you the one with long sideburns, hand me the chain saw. I will cut her head to see if there is a tumor inside. Let there be blood! Ha!

Case 3:
Supplicant #3: Your Lordship, my in-laws have been harassing me to bring more dowry.
Salman Khurshid: Dowry? Hmm....does it bleed?
Supplicant: No, your honor, it means money.
Salman Khurshid: Chamchon, I mean, courtiers, bring her in-laws to our court and beat them until they vomit blood.

Case 4:
Supplicant #4: My Lord, these men want fair probe in Robert Vadra's land deals.
Salman Khurshid: Poke their eyes and cut their bloody tongues, but leave their ears intact. They should be able to hear my answers, but shouldn't be able to question.

Case 5:
Supplicant #5 (A courtier with a Gandhi topi and a mustache): Your Lordship, there is this journalist, who has been condemning your bloody verdicts on her TV show.
Salman Khurshid: Blood, blood! I want to see her blood!
(The next day, the honorable minister's courtiers storm the woman journalist's office. She sends them back with her used sanitary napkins.)

33 comments:

  1. Giribala the scenario is bloody miserable.High ranking ministers are coming up with such inanities that one is forced to speculate about their IQs.

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    Replies
    1. I guess they try to match the lowest of the low IQ to be considered true grass-root leaders!

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  2. He should start writing official letters with his blood. That way he will be working with both kalam and lahu.

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  3. I was actually waiting for a statement around media misquoting the minister.
    It seems the guy means business.

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    1. I actually didn't believe what I read about his new-found love until I watched this video!

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  4. what about a ' blood bath' for him? would he like the taste as well?

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    Replies
    1. Yeah, he would then go down the history like Cleopatra, who bathed in milk...

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  5. Maybe he meant blood donation camps for disabled people.

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    1. Damn! I think you are right. He might be thinking of donating his blood on a daily basis for the sick and needy!! How stupid of us for assuming and harboring negativity!

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  6. Sick man! He seems to have lost his mind :(

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  7. Well, First raja Bhaiyya now Salman....Beware Giribala...In raja bhaiyya's case it was a Fan that threatened you, here it might be Mr. Khurshid himself seeking a vampire bite from you...:)..As always, the ending twist was great!

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    1. Violence whether in words or deeds is something I cannot tolerate. If I didn't speak against it, future generations will blame me of complicity :-/

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  8. (The next day, the honorable minister's courtiers storm the woman journalist's office. She sends them back with her used sanitary napkins.)

    > Gosh! that was dirty. It brings back some dirty memories.

    -- mahesh

    PS: Salman Khurshid's favourite line from history: tum mujhe khoon do main tumhe azadi dunga

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    1. Mahesh, I think the words coming out of the honorable minister are dirtier than a used napkins!
      His favorite line is: tum mujhse transparency mango, main tumhare khoon se khelunga...

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  9. It is because of men like Khurshid that congress will see itself going six feet under ground.

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  10. He has clearly lost it. He doesn't know how to respond as his corruption has been exposed. Sad state that the Law minister of this country is not clean.

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    Replies
    1. It looks like our politicians do not have the word apology in their dictionary...

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  11. Very interestingly put Giri .
    Situation seems gory !

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  12. country is in a mess. go to get gas and they ask to go to another place and get in BLACK!

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  13. Well, you have written, i mean typed with all para including climax with blood ... it's the spirit of Salman khurshid.

    But whole episode exposed an angry young man under the face of elite gentleman :-)

    i read almost all your post and wonder how the ideas come to you in this wonderful style. i am jealous (as i am not writing) with u :-)

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    1. Thanks Arkjesh! I am also stuck most of the time without ideas thus can't update the blog as regularly as I want to.
      Thank you for being a regular reader and for the nice words. May Ma Unicorn bless you with knowledge, wisdom, and more ideas for your blog :-)

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  14. Coming here so late; been unwell. Well the dispensing of justice is indeed gory and bloody. I was shocked and ashamed that such a suave person like Khurshid went berserk that day. It was a nauseating sight. And yes, the twist at the end was great!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks Zephyr! Now seeing him justifying his comments in even more nauseating!

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